Before I start writing my review, I’d like to say one thing: I’m not into the Twilight Saga. I saw the 1st movie, and really hated it. I thought it was extremely cheesy and was definitely a perfect movie for pimpled teenage girls. I felt like I was in pain hearing some of the dialogues in the movie. I’ve seen a lot of cheesy movies before, but that one was literally at the top of the list.
So now you’re probably wondering, if I hated the 1st one so much, then why did I even bother to see the 2nd one and basically let myself endure the same pain and suffering for nearly 2 hours? Well the answer is, I have no idea. I kept asking myself that question over and over, from the moment I bought the ticket until the time the movie began.. I kept wondering what the hell I am doing here and still had no clue why I was there.
A few seconds after the lights turned down the girls started screaming. I looked up only to find the movie was still showing the opening credit. I was like, you’ve got to be kidding me. Neither Edward or Jacob was in sight and they already started screaming?! Some were clapping their hands. I was sitting there, torn between whether I should scream my lungs out like the girls in the theater, or start clapping my hands like a crazy person.
I honestly don’t understand what’s so hot about this Edward guy. He’s too skinny, too pale and not so good-looking. Heck if I were a girl, I don’t think I’d be into Edward. Even for a vampire, he’s too damn sensitive. Too goddamn soft. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was a vegetarian and drove a station wagon before he became a vampire.
The girls started screaming again at the sight of Edward coming out of his car.. Oh god. But this time, they would also scream at the sight of Jacob’s sick puppies (a.k.a. Jacob’s six pack). I could honestly tell that the director intentionally had his screenwriters write a lot of scenes where Jacob would show up with his shirt off, flaunting his rock hard abs. Either they’d scream or I’d hear occasional gasps with eyes staring intently at the screen hahahhaaaa… Ahh teenage girls, they’re so easy to please.
I honestly thought this movie was so much better than the 1st one. There were a few action scenes – my favorite one was the one where this pack of wolves running after this black vampire and finally ripped him apart. That was pretty cool. I kinda wish the director would have done it Tarantino style though. More blood and gory. Oh my other favorite scene was the one where Edward fighting against this club bouncer-lookin vampire in Italy.. He basically grabbed Edward and tossed him around like a rag doll. That was pretty fun seeing Edward being tossed around left and right and wasn’t able to do anything about it.
Overall, I think this movie was made only for teenage girls. It’s definitely not a date movie – believe me, I don’t think you can get any action after seeing this movie. The Edward guy – totally not hot. That Jacob guy on the other hand, he was alright. I could see why girls would drool over him. Edward’s dad needed to have more lines, and possibly his own action scenes. It would’ve been awesome if Blade had all of sudden come out of nowhere and started slaying the vampires hahahaaa.. Oh one more thing, if I get the question again (that’s been going around on Facebook): “Whose team am I on – team Edward or team Jacob”? I’d say I’ll be on team shut-the-hell-up-I’ve-had-enough-of-Twilight.
IndoDONKEY Alert!
